Many restaurant leaders unknowingly set themselves up for failure by limiting communication with their teams to directives and performance reviews. If your employees’ annual reviews feel like a battlefield, filled with confusion, defensiveness, or even outright resistance, the root cause is often a lack of ongoing dialogue. When expectations, feedback, and personal development are only addressed sporadically, it creates a disconnect between leaders and their teams.

The solution? Consistent, structured one-on-one meetings.

One-on-ones provide an opportunity for managers and team members to align on expectations, share concerns, and build trust. They ensure that feedback isn’t reserved for the end of the year but becomes part of a continuous development cycle. More importantly, they give employees a platform to voice their ideas and challenges, fostering a culture of collaboration and accountability.

The Non-Negotiables of Effective One-on-Ones

To make one-on-ones truly impactful, they must be structured and treated as a top priority. Here are six non-negotiables to follow:

1. Schedule Them Like Payroll – One-on-ones should be as consistent as clocking in. A recurring, visible schedule helps set expectations and ensures both parties are prepared.

2. Never Cancel (Barring Emergencies) – If a leader repeatedly deprioritizes one-on-ones, employees will feel their professional growth is unimportant. This is one meeting that should always happen.

3. It’s About Them – The employee should speak 65 percent of the time. This is their opportunity to share challenges, progress, and concerns. The leader’s role is to listen and guide the conversation.

4. Follow a Structured Agenda – A 30-minute format works best:

• First 10 minutes: Employee-led discussion on any topic they choose (family, personal interests, workplace concerns).
• Middle 10 minutes: Follow-up on previous discussions and check-ins on ongoing projects.
• Final 10 minutes: Career development and goal-setting conversations.

5. No Devices – Taking notes on a laptop or checking notifications mid-conversation diminishes engagement. Handwritten notes are preferable to create a more authentic, focused experience.

6. Confidential & Private Setting – One-on-ones should be conducted in a space where employees feel comfortable speaking openly without distractions or interruptions.

The Power of Intentional Listening

A one-on-one is not just a status update—it’s an opportunity to strengthen relationships and leadership effectiveness. When employees feel heard, they are more likely to take ownership of their performance and contribute meaningfully to the team. Listening with intent requires more than nodding along; it means actively engaging in the conversation and responding in a way that makes the other person feel truly understood.

Great leaders know that their role in these meetings is not to dominate the conversation but to create a space where employees feel comfortable sharing openly. One strategy is to ask open-ended questions that go beyond surface-level discussions. For example:

• What challenges have you faced this week?
• What’s something you’re proud of from the past few days?
• Are there any roadblocks preventing you from doing your best work?
• What are your long-term career goals, and how can I support you?
• How can we make your day-to-day responsibilities more efficient or fulfilling?

Beyond asking great questions, leaders should also demonstrate active listening techniques. This includes paraphrasing what the employee has said to confirm understanding, asking follow-up questions to gain deeper insight, and maintaining consistent eye contact to signal full engagement.

Mark Horstman of Manager Tools emphasizes the power of listening as a leadership skill: “The moment an employee realizes their manager genuinely cares about their growth and challenges, trust is built. That trust leads to engagement, commitment, and ultimately, results.”

When employees feel heard, they become more invested in their work, are more willing to receive feedback, and are more likely to stay with an organization long-term.

Accountability Through Cadence

One-on-ones don’t just enhance communication; they create a cadence of accountability. When managers meet regularly with their team members, they can track progress, recognize achievements, and address issues proactively rather than reactively. This consistency reduces the need for frequent crisis management and builds a culture of trust and growth.

Think of one-on-ones like a team’s weekly practice before game day. Without structured, consistent training, a team can’t expect to perform at its best when it matters most. A coach doesn’t just give feedback at the end of the season—he works with players continuously, helping them improve each week so they’re ready when the pressure is on. The same principle applies to leadership. By keeping regular one-on-ones, managers ensure their team is constantly refining their skills, addressing small setbacks before they become major problems, and maintaining peak performance.

Steve Taylor, a seasoned hospitality leader, emphasizes the importance of structure: “The most important rule of a one-on-one is to never cancel. Death, taxes, and keeping the one-on-one meeting—that’s the rule. Managers should let employees lead the conversation, using a structured PRIMER document to track store metrics, yearly goals, and external challenges.” This level of commitment ensures that one-on-ones remain an integral part of leadership, not an afterthought.

The Takeaway

One-on-ones are not a luxury; they are an essential leadership tool. By committing to structured, employee-focused meetings, restaurant leaders can foster trust, improve performance, and reduce turnover. Most importantly, they create a leadership culture where employees feel valued, heard, and empowered to grow.

Source: Jason E. Brooks, FSR